Women's Studies

Drove to Ballard this morning to pick up a green leather chair for a new immersion exhibit in the old hotel, where we plan to share stories from the lives of women who lived and worked in the building. (According to her granddaughter, one of these ladies used to sit for hours in a chair like this, watching "Gilligan's Island" on a black and white TV, crocheting, and chatting with her friends in Chinese. Sometimes she'd read their letters out loud for them, since most of the women in her generation were illiterate.) 

On the way back, I swung by Home Depot to get some materials for another installation now in progress, then headed back to the Museum to unload it all. Thus over the course of the day I had the opportunity to perform several variants on the classic sociology experiment: What happens when a man sees a woman – particularly a woman in a skirt and heels – carrying something heavy all by herself? 

My sample size was seven. Some of the subjects were men I knew well; one I had just met; some were strangers who happened to be walking through Home Depot parking lot or standing outside the fortune cookie factory across the street from the Museum loading dock. In some instances I was genuinely struggling (like when I had to wrangle a couple of 50 lb rolls of plastic sheeting down off a high shelf and into a squirrelly shopping cart); other times I was doing just fine (the ottoman is just not that heavy, honestly); in the case of the chair, I would have been hard pressed to carry it any real distance on my own, with or without heels. In no circumstance was I attempting to attract aid through ostentatious incompetence; nor was I defiantly determined to prove my fish-without-a-bicycle womynly autonomy. (Having been in each of those states at different points in my life, I can appreciate that the whole thing may feel like a bit of a minefield to some men.) 

I can report that with a few exceptions the American male, regardless of age, race, or level of acquaintance, appears to be capable of offering and/or providing assistance in a way that does not imply that a woman carrying something heavy couldn’t possibly manage without him, or that she is an idiot for getting herself into this situation in the first place. The older ones are slightly more prone to wondering aloud what their mothers would think of them if they sat back and "let" a lady proceed with such a task unassisted. The younger ones are able to retreat with slightly more grace when their services are not required. As the principal investigator I am prepared to accept that the decrease in overall tension surrounding these interactions since the last time I ran this experiment may have more to do with my own advancing age than with any progress toward gender equity. 

Took a moment at the end of it all to sit in the green leather chair and contemplate how very different my life has been from that of the Chinese grandmother. I'd have liked to sit and crochet with her, though. It's been a long time since I've seen "Gilligan's Island."